The Passion of Touching One's Heart

How far can a person chase after what they desire? How long can they sustain this passion, and what do they take as an inspiration to keep going? Or is desiring something enough on its own? Is there a need to run, or should one stop and rest? These have been some of the most frequent questions I have asked myself since I became aware of my own existence. In truth, what I longed for the most was to be free, completely and literally free. To live and help others without being dependent on anything or anyone, whether a person, an object, or even a thought. Yes, I said “help others” because, while every particle of mine existed, I carried within me the eagerness to help the hearts that shared the same passion. And this eagerness was so delightful, so exhilarating that I might need to be a poet to fully explain the emotions it awakened in me. However, my heart’s desire could not be confined to poetry alone. It was far more than that for me.

To live more meaningfully, I needed to touch, hold hands, to look into the eyes of others. I can only be a human being if I feel spiritual fulfilment within my heart and make others feel it, too. Touching the heart of a child, caressing their hair, witnessing their smile or laughter, and wiping away their tears make me feel grateful. I cherished every moment deeply and intensely. I dreamt, always dreamt.

Every time I laid my head on the pillow, every time I closed my eyes, I dreamt. I dreamt of being a light on the path of a child who had lost the light in their eyes, of holding their hand if they stumbled along the way. I dreamt of being family to them, making them feel that they were not alone. I dreamt of striving so that their soul would be filled with peace, so that they would never have to shed a tear, just as my teachers had done for me. They nourished my soil so beautifully that it was almost impossible not to bloom. They looked into my eyes with such a deep belief, and wrapped my soul with such warmth that not fighting for my passion would have been unimaginable. And most importantly, they raised me with immense care and sensitivity, never allowing tears to fall from my eyes. And now, after walking this path along with them, it is time for me to become one of them. It is my turn to raise the seeds in the soil. It is my turn to shine upon them, just like the sun itself!

Life now feels more meaningful and livable because I have won the battle I waged against the stereotypes. By merging my determination with my positive attitude, I have always kept my hope alive. Yes, I said I kept my hope alive. Could I exist without hope? If I had no hope, how could I teach it to the pure-hearted souls? I had to shine first so that I could illuminate the lives around me. And now, when I lift my head to the sky and feel the warmth of the sun on my skin, I can say, “This is it! This is what it means to live—to touch another soul and to embrace it.” Whenever I see the vast blue sky or sit on the rocks, gazing at the endless sea, I have the same feelings: “The rebellious, yet blue sky! The fierce, yet hopeful waves of the sea!” These are the unique beauties that remind me of life and what it means to live truly. For every child and every young person whose heart I will touch, my wish remains the same: To be able to teach them to see the meaning of life, and to lift their heads towards the sky with an unwavering hope.

May love, hope, faith, determination, and the power of positivity always be with you!

Özlem